History more parts then one

So the other day I was rambling about being paralized by fear, which is weird if you think that courage is not the absense of fear but the ability to take action while in the presense of fear , so how is it that someone who is trained as a combat soldier be paralized by fear , good question , when there is an extreme lack of clear and present danger to my physical being i find it difficult to muster the courage to face down my worst fears, a fear of success , a fear of the unknown , a fear of failure , people don't plan to fail they simply fail to plan , which makes sense if I plan for a certain event and things go according to plan there should be nothing to fear , but life like battle can be a fluid situation , one has to adapt and overcome unforseen obsticles , unfortunately , beating on my chest teeth bared grunting like a savage and masculinly guestulating only evotes gales of laughter from the feminine horde I co habitate with , as a matter of fact the other day I did just a thing standing in my kitchen the older of the youthful co-habitants strolled over layed her tiny little hand on my fore arms and with big blue eyes told me" ït's ok Daddy", heavy sigh so much for masculine performances , so it seems to be the story of my life whenever I try to express myself in a masculine way there is always a woman of sorts there to let me know how ridiculous this is and that I should simply accept the situation the way it is and move on , but what if I want to rage against the storm , to rebel against the injustice of life at times to feel like I am a meaningful part of society and contributing in a way that could possible mean something to others then those I share an abode with ???