Destiny and its child cognative choice

So it seems that once you have purged the history , decided how you got to where you are and rehashed the mistakes you made along the way.Vowing of course not to make those same mistakes again that with destinys aid you can make the same mistakes over an over again.Unlike teh definition of insanity which is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result , destiny will guide you to make the same hard choices repeatedly unless you chose correctly or until you chose correctly. It isn't so much about emotion except when you deny the preordained and make that wrong choice, but the question is if you stick with that and ignore the consequences is it the wrong choice or the lesson you need to learn that illusive that we simply choose to ignore it.
So is destiny about the cognitive choices we make or are the choices we make actually part of the ultimate destiny , are they more about the journey then the destination and when you achieve the happiness that we all so desperately pursue is that the final destination , it seems odd that married men are not so much preordained to die earlier , just more eager.
Why do I have to get married again I didn't do anything wrong , there is a reason that married is not a vow but a sentence , the shortest spoken sentence with teh greatest impact.
Bitter twisted , otherwise crazy perhaps clinically but then again what or who is it that should decide these things and if they do , do we really have to answer to that or only the face in the mirror in the morning.
Its amazing how small things can change the perspective of how we deal with life and the curves that it tosses our way. The prospect of a brighter tommorow , the thought that I can do this , cautious optomism , slowly we peer out into the brightness of the new day , feeling very much like a character in a Tragically Hip song , all squint eyed and confused , breath deep and move forward regardless of the consequences , but what if it was the last time , the last day , the only chance you had to do the things that you had really really wanted to do but didn't for whatever the reason was at the time , regret , is there any time for that in the end ?
Is it a bad thing to live like you were dieing , to pursue the things that are important to you and forsake the ones that you care about most , or is that just to greedy?
SO many questions burning so little time